Sunday, October 5, 2008
ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVE
You know, it’s not so bad that my ex-wife runs her own attack website. Or that she constantly releases old video clips meant to embarrass me -- heck, the one she released this past weekend shows a guy filled with energy and exuberance, the kind of guy you’d love to have a beer with (BONNIE’S NOTE: OR, YOU CAN ASSUME FROM THAT VIDEO, FOUR OR FIVE BEERS PLUS HALF-A-BOTTLE OF PEPPERMINT SCHNAPPES. YOU CAN SEE OUR VIDEO UPDATE ON WWW.VOTEGARNER.COM, BUT MARCINE HAS PLACED THE UNEDITED CLIP ON HER SITE, WWW.GARNERSTINKS.COM. THE NERVE!).
No, it’s that she’s doing it all from behind the gates of Vernehenge, the beautiful estate I built with money from my severance package when I was asked to leave my show, “Travelin’ Man!”. Now I’m not saying I was the perfect husband, but don’t I deserve to live somewhere a little better than a one-room bachelor apartment above the now-defunct Sweets-N-Treats store? I’m not a bitter man, but if Marcine was as smart as I think she is, she would come around and see that, all personal feelings aside, I’m much better for this town than her choice, Winston Blank.
And by the way, if anyone has a hot-plate they could donate, I’d appreciate it -- mine shorted out last week.
God Bless Verne, and God Bless America.